No Agreement today
Disagreeable people can’t achieve great things together.
Fela sang:
No agreement today, no
agreement tomorrow
If one looks around and lists the people that they are in
regular contact with and find there is no one in that list that will do what
they tell them to, there are only two things to do. One is to accept that no
great thing will be achieved in this life (since nothing can be achieved alone).
Two is to find new people.
Working with people effectively boils down to being an
exchange of commands or suggestions. If someone says ‘no’ to all your
suggestions then you are wasting time together. Music is an easy example for
illustrating the symbiotic nature of producing a final product. If the vocalist
and record producer say ‘no’ to each other’s suggestions on how the work should
go, a time will come when it will be imperative they shake hands and say good
bye.
Great partnerships like the one between Michael Jackson and
Quincy Jones involves a certain amount of give and take. There has to be
agreement on the genre of music, the type of instrumentalists and choice of
songs. The first run is never mutually satisfactory especially when great
perfectionists are involved and that means more suggestions and instructions of
what to try to make things better.
Some instructions in partnerships are not even spoken out.
When agreeableness and compatibility are reached a certain stage, things become
telepathic. We see that in football when great players like Nwankwo Kanu (Arsenal
FC) used to send out those defence splitting passes deep from mid field that
had the stadium wondering who he was passing to. Like the delivering of a baton
to a runner, the pass becomes an instruction and the striker runs like the wind
and latches onto the ball scoring the goal.
People who hate each other have been known to work well and
achieve great things together because when professional matters came up they collaborated,
responded to cues and fought for each other. Outside of the professional arena
they might not even send each other Christmas cards.
These are environments of trust. People knowing that they
are working with someone who can deliver and thus are willing to break their
necks to see the vision come to pass. That is when teams become well-oiled
machines, communication is frictionless and collaboration is the main thing on
the agenda.
Unfortunately many never find themselves in these
environments where their views are respected or even trusted. Rather than just
get used to this ‘hopeless’ situation an urgent self-appraisal is needed.
Questions like: Who am I? What do I do best? What do I bring to the table? Have
I improved my skills to the best I can? Have I demonstrated what I am capable
of to others? Need to be asked and answered truthfully.
Next the people around need to be studied. Do they have
ambition? Are they willing to work hard and develop themselves? Are there goals
they are aiming for? Do they have the talents and skills required to achieve
the share objectives?
If an individual and the people around them have not
developed skills or have no shared objectives or vision then nothing gets done.
No one trusts each other and no one believes in any one. One going nowhere usually believes that if you
were going somewhere you wouldn’t be hanging around them all day. So why should
they take suggestions from someone who they feel is going nowhere?
People complain about how dissatisfied they are in
relationships all day long and the usual suspects keep on complaining year in
year out without changing themselves or their circle. Sometimes they don’t get
admitted into more progressive circles because they have not ‘paid their dues’.
Some groups of people listen to one another and these are
the professionals. The lawyers, accountants and even boxers! You cannot turn up
in a boxing gym and start giving suggestions on how to swing a punch just
because you have Sky TV and have watched a few bouts. You need to have won a
belt or passed some coaching exams and be known in the sporting fraternity
before anyone listens.
The same is true with the Army. There are people who give
orders that no one argues with but it takes years of training to be a senior
commanding officer.
We trust authority figures; familiar faces, lovers, and
those we see standing in front of great crowds such as pop stars, Politicians,
religious leaders and captains of industry. Some of these people worked their
way up through hard work and doing what they were instructed to do, and
sometimes over performing on their targets. Family, childhood friends and
lovers are familiar faces that can be trusted but might never agree with any
progressive thought or ideas and can turn out to be stumbling blocks or even
mountains.
Once in a while you may get a student arguing on some points
with teachers but by and large people headed for the top in any profession
start out learning and developing their own learning styles. A trainee heart
surgeon cannot be arguing with the boss when the patient lies on the table with
the chest open and neither would the army cadet be arguing with the commandant
of the military school in lessons. People who work collaboratively know the
value of listening and communicating and this comes from training. Astronauts
on the Space station miles above the earth would have learnt how to resolve
conflicts as a fight in outer space will endanger the crew and valuable
equipment.
That environment of no agreement is toxic. Nothing grows
there. Planting seeds in the Sahara will not be fruitful as the dry hot sand
cannot respond to the demands of the seed for a cooler soil rich in moisture. No agreement today, no agreement tomorrow,
no chance of success.
Plant that same seed in a different location and the fruits
are surplus.
Can two walk together
unless they agree?
It is usually best to observe people and test them. Pretend
you are doing a lot of talking and then suggest things. See if they brain storm
your ideas with you or they just dismiss them and argue for hours on why these
ideas will fail.
Mark these people and avoid them like Ebola because for the next hundred years you would still not
achieve anything good with them in your life.
